THE PAST
When I started high school at 14 years old, I wanted a boyfriend like most of my friends. I thought it was up to me to find my Prince Charming and create my happily ever after ending. Fast forward to age 17 and as I was reflecting on how truly blessed I was to have a mom who was home with me every afternoon after school, I decided I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. Ok, so then I blink and I'm in college and have a baby-sitting job for a family that home-school their children. I do extensive research on the home-schooling lifestyle for Sociology class. You see where this is leading? Yes, I decided I wanted to home-school my kids...now all I needed was a husband :)
MY PRESENT
After 3 1/2 years of marital bliss to my husband who was God-sent to me, I am closer to 30 than 20, and no closer to being a mom. OK, now what?
Whether you are a man or woman, Christ-follower or non-believer, we have all as people had dreams and made wishes about our futures. But what happens when our lives don't turn out how we wished, prayed, worked 80 hours a week to achieve, etc.? For me, I got angry, bitter, resentful, withdrawn, and downright pitiful! And up until last week I was also miserable :)
What was my breakthrough? The Bible. Specifically Psalm 37:3-7, "Trust in the Lord and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. Delight thyself also in the Lord; and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in Him; and He shall bring it to pass. And He shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday. Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass."
See, Jesus is telling me that if I trust in Him and follow Him, He will give me the desires of my heart. I can know without a doubt that He will grant my prayers and bless me. All I have to do is wait patiently for His blessing, and not get mad at others who have what I want. Yeah right! I was not doing this AT ALL! I was very upset about not being able to conceive, and I certainly envied women and girls who were getting pregnant all around me!
But the Lord never left my side, and He waited patiently until I finally accepted that He is the author of Life and I was never going to have a baby while I was trying to get pregnant on my own. So I prayed for His direction for my life, and he opened up the doors for me to become a certified Christ Centered Yoga Instructor, to go back to school to get my Master's Degree, and an employment opportunity. Praise Him!
Oh and by the way, after my two-year commitment to Christ Centered Yoga is completed in December 2011, we are moving to Colorado Springs! Why? Because we have never lived out West, and we just love the idea of skiing every weekend. Remember the dreams I was talking about earlier? Mine was always to live in an urban community, to reside in a fully furnished swanky downtown loft apartment, and take weekend trips to California. Never in a million years did I think that life would ever be mine...then again I never thought I would be this age without children- God works in mysterious ways.
Objective: Find joy in everyday life, and Glorify the Lord through my decisions
Obstacles: Going back to school, starting a new job, and buying another car!
Time-line: January 16, 2012- Colorado Springs here we come!
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